Leaving Behind, Carrying Forward

I consider beginning new programs or committing to change habits, because I open a new calender, rather arbitrary and counterproductive. Lasting change occurs when we are ready, usually after many unsuccessful attempts which teach us what doesn't work. I prefer to continue the good habits I began last year and bid a fond farewell to the behaviors and beliefs I left behind in 2008. So I begin this New Year with several successful habit changes, helpful insights and a commitment to carry forward what helped me heal during the past year. I also want to leave behind the unhealthy habits, counterproductive behaviors and irrational beliefs that kept my body unhealthy for so many years, but especially during the past year.

HERE'S WHAT I WANT TO BRING WITH ME INTO 2008:

Daily letters to God in my prayer journal;

Considering why I want to eat and how I want to feel when I stop, before every meal;

Conscious, mindful eating (I'm currently reading "Eating the Moment: 141 Mindful Practices to Overcome Overeating One Meal at a Time" by Pavel G. Somov.);

Choosing to nurture my body, by eating just enough food to satisfy and feel comfortably full, when I stop eating, rather than deprive my body of comfort and well-being by overeating;

Daily, prayerful walks alone and/or quiet walks arm in arm with my husband (we began that during the icy/snowy weather when we hung onto each other to prevent falling);

Patience with my recovery from physical symptoms like irregularity, reactions to accidental contamination by food allergies, injuries, etc.;

Continue to freely choose foods that I enjoy eating, as well as 'whole body pleaser' foods which taste good, feel good in my body and leave me unhungry for several hours;

Considering my husband's perspective when I feel frustrated by his actions;

Talk less and listen more;

Keeping a running list of tasks I would LIKE to complete, but not considering those 'must do's;

Continue to teach myself to sew, do alterations and construct garments;

Continue learning by writing this blog;

HERE'S WHAT I INTEND TO LEAVE BEHIND IN 2008:

BORING posts about mealtime self-talk LOL;

Telling myself 'Oh what the heck, I might as well binge' to rationalize bingeing and purging;

Unnecessarily restricting any food that is 'safe' (not a food allergy or intolerance or lower esophageal relaxer which causes reflux);

Freaking out over irregularity, rather than graciously accepting my body rhythms;

Speaking, before thinking, when I feel frustrated by my husband's actions or words;

'Chipmunk cheeks' caused by bingeing and purging;

Ignoring my physical needs (for food, sleep, bathroom time, etc.) while on the computer;

Purchasing new clothing when I feel frustated or deprived;

Taking on new responsibilities (like volunteering to lead groups or help organizations in other ways) without prayerfully considering whether God intends those for me;

Reflux caused by overeating, consuming alcohol or caffeine, and a few other foods;

Urgency to complete every item on my to do list, while I ignore opportunities for spontaneous connection with people I love.
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That's a lot to leave behind and carry with me. I know that I already 'left' many of those items behind during the last months of 2008. Other items will require conscious effort to continue or permanently leave behind.