Feeding My Inner Child

I did get hungry before I returned home from my walk yesterday. However, I remembered what I read in "Eating The Moment" about hunger ('Studying the Moment of Hunger Relief'):

"You might be surprised to find that your intensity of hunger isn't necessarily proportional to the amount of food you need to relieve it. Hunger operates more like an alarm system than an indicator of how much to eat. Just because you're very hungry doesn't mean that you have to eat a lot ... A small (amount) will do just fine."

Since I had no choice (no money and no food), I just kept walking. However I prepared lunch as soon as I got home. My 1/2 apple and turkey with lettuce, mayo and cranberry sauce on "Seattle Brown (gluten free) Bread" tasted sooooo good. As I finished 2 more apple slices after the sandwich (for a total of 6 of 1/2 apple), I distinctly heard my inner child say, "OK, no more apple. I've had enough." Yet, as I got up, that same inner child wanted another 'taste' of something sweet, preferably 'Passionate Mango' vegan ice cream. My inner parent said: "You said you had enough. You could have eaten more apple."

However I then recalled advice from "Eating the Moment" about craving specific tastes ('Exploring Sensory-Specific Satiety'):

"Try to remain conscious of whether you're eating to satisfy your biological hunger or sensory hunger. Ask yourself, 'Do I want this food because I am still hungry, or am I just intested in its taste?' If chasing the taste, then just taste; have a mindful bite. You don't have to eat a whole serving just because you are interested in a taste! Also, factor in sensory-specific satisety by cutting bac on portion size. leave room for the curiostiy of your tongue ... when faced with a diversity of tastes, choose to taste alll you can taste, not necessarily to eat all you can eat."

So I fed my inner child about 2 spoonfuls of that ice cream. She was satisfied and didn't want anything else.

How many times have I let my critical parent rule my frightened inner child? How many times have I ignored my child's hunger and then later stuffed her with food after she felt satisfied. How many times have I forced my inner child to eat large servings of 'healthy' foods, when she really wanted a small serving of healthy food followed by a taste of something sweet? My mother may have stopped either ignoring my hunger or overfeeding me YEARS ago. However, my critical inner parent has carried on her work since my mom stopped dictating how, when and what I ate. I can't make up for all the times I deprived myself of foods I loved or stuffed myself with 'healthy' foods or even binged and purged on sweets. Nevertheless I can lovingly acknowledge and feed my inner child's needs for food, rest, play and LOVE in whatever form she needs.